10 Signs That Say, I have really grown up!

I would randomly be walking or doing something when I would have that “aha” moment and say to myself, “Oh my gosh, I am grown!” I think about the responsibilities that I now have, the types of activities I participate in, the conversations I have with people and I just have to take a second and marvel at the thought of maturing into a lovely young woman. I am so thankful that I am not a child anymore but there are times when I am like, “ugh, do I have to adult today?” Do you ever get like that? Where you are like I just need to run away and take a break from adulthood? That is me pretty often but I love the fact that I have progressed, achieved goals, traveled and lived a life that I am proud to tell my future children.

There are so many blog posts and articles that list the top 20 things to do before you are 20, or 30 things you should have accomplished by 30 and so on. These lists leave many feeling inadequate and feeling like they have not accomplished much in life. These lists are just ideas and I hope that people do not take it as truths and rules. I believe that life is not all about “DOING” but more on “BECOMING” and Facebook and other sites are sending a message that DOING is greater than BECOMING.

It took me awhile to mentally disconnect my lane from others lanes, I kept trying to cross over but realized this is my journey and nobody else’s. I compete with my yesterday self and work on becoming a better person than I was before.

Many people fail tests and keep repeating the same mistakes because they are only DOING and not BECOMING. There is no transformation happening, no progression just the same ish different day and that is not what life is about!

I thought about signs when I realized that I have truly grown up, matured, progressed and transformed and created a list of 10 signs and of course there are more but this is just to get the minds excited. One of my favorite scriptures in the Bible is 2 Corinthians 5:17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. You want to BECOME new… not stay the same and expecting different results- THAT”S INSANITY. These signs made me realize how much I have grown in the past years.

10 Signs That Say, “I Have Really Grown Up”

1. When I was able to laugh at myself. Too many people take themselves too seriously, it is hard being around someone that cannot laugh at the fact that they messed up or they did something crazy. It is ok to laugh at yourself! I try to do it before others do it first!
2. When I was alone but I wasn’t lonely. I actually thrive on being alone- the best time to think and get to know myself even deeper. I was nervous to be alone while in the process of getting a divorce but the more I was alone the more I fell in love with just being in my own presence! It helps when you are silly and love to dance to YOUR own beat and laugh at yourself knowing I cannot dance if my life depended on it!
3. When you realize you, your health, your mind, your dreams and aspirations matter. I realized I did not want people to have to take care of me as I aged and knew that what I put in my body could do harm or heal. I make conscious decisions about what I eat. Along with food, you have to think about the things that you put in your mind, so much crap on tv and on social media that will corrupt and tarnish your mind- what you put in will come out. Read crazy books and watch fight videos, women cursing each other out, and whatever- you are going to think that is the norm when it is not and that is what you will do, fight and cuss folks out. When I realized that I wanted positive thoughts and healthy food in my body- positive dreams and aspirations came flowing through my head and knew that I wanted to be a part of a change in the world. I knew that my dreams need to become more than that and if I am not healthy physically or mentally it will be hard to make my dreams come to fruition.
4. When you have the courage to let go of friends or relationships that are not good for you. Man- I was listening to Pynk Morning Latte/Mika Joi (go follow her on twitter and periscope) this morning and she was talking about letting go of toxic people and I had thought about the relationships that brought me sorrow I knew I grew up when I realized they were just holding me back from my destiny and that we will be ok going our separate ways.
5. When you finish crying and realize I am still standing. My ex husband and I were planning on going our separate ways about a year and a half into the marriage and I was a wreck. I didn’t know what I was going to do. I thought life was going to end. It wasn’t until the finale of my relationship where I stopped crying and realized life goes on, life can be so much better. That is when I said, “Chin up ButterCup” time to keep it moving and the crying stopped and what filled its place was hope and goals and dreams for my future!
6. When you allow yourself to really love and let go of the fear. This, I have to be honest, I am still working on it but I know that once this happens I will open up endless opportunities. I can love without being in love. I can love without expecting someone to love me back. I can love hard and still be free to be me.
7. When you can choose your battles wisely. Not every battle needs to be fought, not every argument you need the last word. There are issues that are so insignificant that if you fight it the consequences could be so much greater than the problem and then you will look back and think was it even worth it. Like did I really need to go slap that girl for taking the last bag of chocolate cookies… now I am sitting in jail and have a record lol! NOT THAT SERIOUS I KNOW!
8. When you get the courage to do what makes you happy. So many times we are worried about others happiness and lose ourselves, we forget what we once loved, what once made is happy. We are working hard for others and sacrifice our happiness. That is not the way to live and we are doing a disservice to others as they look to you and me for guidance. Yea working hard is a great trait but not doing what you love is a huge turnoff. I get so turned on when I see a man in their passion, doing that thing that makes them happy. When you are not happy the people closest to you will feel that and not want to be around you.
9. When you realize time is precious. Time is of the essence, time is money… time is not coming back. You cannot rewind time, you may can make yourself look younger but you age just like the rest of us. When I realized time is precious I realized that I need to make an effort to make my time matter- create lasting memories and not let time pass me by. Life is too short and I want to make my time count.
10. When you realize your actions speak louder than your words. I did not realize that my presence influenced people! I used to work with Girl Scouts and other youth programs and did not realize how closely they were watching me. I knew I didn’t want my behaviour to influence in a negative way. People on the street watched me and I am my brand! I am a walking billboard for CicelyRenee and no matter how much I talk and what I say it is my actions that are going to speak volumes.

These are just a few and what my realization may not be your realizations and that is ok. So what are some of those moments that made you realize you were grown?

If this was good for you as it was for me lol please share and comment! Thank you,

CicelyRenee